[it's 5:41 AM]
what the heck am i doing up... i' vebeen awake since 4AM and haven't been able to sleep since then. it's a great feeling when all u want to do is sleep but u just lay there and think. makes u wanna punch urself in the face. if only i'd think that much at skewl =P but it's good to have someone who u know u could call at anytime of the day, so i called up a good friend =) and had some weird, but interesting conversation and that definately made the time go by much faster. this is killer. i'm not a bit tired anymore... and i still something hangin on my mind.. weighin down my heart. such crap =P

[The Appreciation Game]
as i told this "good friend", i've come to appreciate those around me that know me very well, probly better than i know myself. a lot of times i try to hide things or plays things off like they don't bother me, but somehow i have a few friends that always know when even the slightest thing is off. in the past, i've taken this as soemthin REALLY annoying because they'd force me into talkin to them about it when i was obviously trying NOT to think about it, but now i realize that i've just taken that for granted, because i do want someone to notice. hehe, i think i'm often reminded of how great the people are around me. i'm a lucky lucky person

["age of reason"]
like Marc Darcy, matt has made me realize that my old diary contains a lot of things that lie in my past that i would really like to forget about. not neccesarily things that happened, but the way i reacted to them was not at all pretty =P or graceful for that matter. so i took it upon myself to buy myself a new diary! i would like to keep with the theme of bridget's second diary "age of reason" because i am no longer a lil gurl and should not write foolish things as i have in my old one.. heh.. but i guess past thoughts always seem a bit foolish when u know how things turn out.. we'll see how this one goes. but yeah.. on a quest to become more like bridget !